Hospice therapy

day 53
first meeting with Kelli ......even though Chris wass not a patient at the Kaplan House, he wsa a Hopsice patient so going there was painful. Sitting in the lobby, watchcing families come and go visitng family members who are dying. They have no idea of the pain they will feel when their loved one dies, I muse. I feel sorry for them knowing what is in their future. I wish i could spare them, but who would have spared me?

Kelli is nice, about my age ( I was happy.....if she was very young I think it would have been hard for me).
I am very teary as I fill her in on the details of Chris' illness and death. She does alot of talking which I needed. What stood out the most was that I have to figure out how to forge a new relationship with Chris. I turn that over in my mind several times. I like the feel of that. He is not gone, I can still have a relationship with him. I just have to figure it out. What will it look like,how will it feel, will it be enough?